One of the more enjoyable things that the ESO and I engage in is a little activity where she names something and I Google Image it to see what comes up.  This frequently leads to me exploring some rather odd parts of the Internet, though… for example:

The ESO mentioned something about bites.  So, I Googled up “bites”, which led to this.  For the record, I will never search for that again; half of the pictures are disgusting pictures of bedbug bites.  That said, it did lead to me hitting up Wikipedia about bedbugs and, in the process, learning about traumatic insemination:

Traumatic insemination is the mating practice of a few species of insects wherein the male pierces the female’s abdomen with his genitals and injects his sperm through the wound into her abdominal cavity. The most widely recorded example is that of Cimex lectularius, the bed bug.^[1]

So, if I were a bug and I felt like impregnating the ESO, it would pretty much involve me raping her in the belly button or thereabouts with the hope that, somewhere in that abdomen of hers, is her uterus, and that, most importantly, I poked the right part of her belly to get my sperm in there.

Uh… what?

Just remember, folks: God’s in his Heaven - all’s right with the world.

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