You Heard It Here First
Any blog can give you the big news highlights of the day. Want to read McCain’s speech? Be my guest. Want some early thoughts on it? Professor Bainbridge to the rescue - or is he? Perhaps you’re not a McCain fan, or even a fan of conservative political ideology. No problem - the Huffington Post is there.
So, what are my thoughts? Who cares? There are thousands of people far more qualified than myself who can pick apart the speech and overanalyze it into oblivion. Let them have their moment. Instead, I will report on the news that really matters - the stuff that absolutely nobody is touching on. That’s right - I’m here to tell you that there is no body in that tree.
From the BBC:
The suspected remains of a WWII airman discovered in a jungle region of Papua New Guinea have turned out to be the moss-covered branches of a tree.
Hikers on the country’s Kokoda Trail found what appeared to be the remains of a parachutist tangled in wires and dangling in a tree two weeks ago.
Australian and Japanese forces fought several battles in the area in 1942-3.
The Australian military sent a team to investigate the “body” only to discover it was a branch tangled in vines.
Rest easy, my fearless readers. Wherever there’s a story about corpse-shaped tree limbs, I’m there. Whenever somebody finds a suspicious looking tree limb in Papua New Guinea, I’m there. When the world seems topsy-turvy and upside down, when the forces of darkness are arrayed against you, keeping you away from the news that really matters, I’m there.
In all seriousness, though, after reading the reactions on the Huffington Post to McCain’s speech, I have to wonder - who did they think the audience of the speech was, exactly? Of course McCain was talking traditional Republican talking points. He was in a room full of Republicans! In other news, pastors give sermons about God in churches! Egads. What, did Obama’s speech really trail off of the usual Democratic talking points? Sure, he talked about cutting some bureaucracy here and there, but he also talked about nationalizing health care, increasing taxes on the top 5% to the highest rates since the Carter administration (that’s what “I will cut taxes cut taxes for 95% of all working families” plus “If you don’t [have health insurance], you’ll be able to get the same kind of coverage that members of Congress give themselves” means), legislating equal pay for equal work (define “equal”), and so forth. Yep, Obama definitely strayed off the beaten path there, let me tell you what.
What’s funny is that, when people talk about “failed Republican ideas”, I don’t think it means what people really think it means. I don’t think people are really saying, “Gee, you know what - Republicans were wrong. We need more government. We need our government to spend more money. We need government to make more choices for us. Yeah, that’s the ticket.” What people are saying is that we need government to actually do what it says it’s going to do, and we need politicians to do something totally and radically out of character for them - do what they promise to do. Ethanol subsidies pointed at corn farmers does not make government smaller, more effective, or even help solve the problem the program is “supposed” to fix. The PATRIOT Act did not make the government smaller, more effective, or help solve the problem it was “supposed” to fix. The TSA… you’re kidding me, right? The list goes on like this, and each of these government programs were created during a Republican administration. One would think that it would go without saying that, if Republicans start acting like Democrats, people are just going to start electing Democrats - and that’s precisely what they’re doing. However, people aren’t happy about that - the proof is the record low approval ratings of Congress. That’s why McCain was stressing the old-hat Republican values - he was signaling to both the American people and the Republican Party that he wasn’t standing for the “Compassionate Conservativism” that Bush Jr. unleashed upon America, but instead for more of a Reaganesque agenda, though hopefully with less Iran-Contra cream filling.
Personally, I’m okay with that. It’s only when your money is free that it’s possible to talk about social freedom - if everybody’s broke, it won’t matter what legislation is on the table regarding abortions, drugs, or gay marriage.
politics | David Colborne | 
September 4, 2008 11:38 pm
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